Moments are composed of intricate patchworks of choices. To a certain extent, everything we do is a choice even though most are made unconsciously.

Each of us has a vast array of filters. They are extremely fluid. They are filters of our physiology and experience as mitigated through the filters imposed on us by others. Our genetic makeup is a major filter through which we respond that differentiates us from the rest.

A person who has grown up in the bayou, for example, is far more likely to have a filter operating that allows him to embrace the wonder of a snake whereas a city-dweller automatically recoils at the sight, or even thought, of one. Perhaps the bayou resident has a filter that places the snake within the larger context of being a natural expression of nature, where the city person sees it as a dangerous aberration to be feared.

Interpretation of an event as either something welcoming or threatening is based on filters that also can come through choice. Since the city-dweller can take the time to read and learn more about snakes, he is just as capable, a week from now, to embrace the wonder of a snake. The only thing that changes is that new filters are added, some of which negate old ones, thereby shifting the interpretation. Our choices are based on our interpretation of events through the filters that are in place at the time. In a circular relationship, our interpretations are based on our choices as well.

As a healer, when faced with someone making a critical choice in her life, its helpful to tune in to some of the filters that are in operation for her at the time. Although basic history and physical evaluation has its place in regards to getting a broad overview of the person, to a large extent, all of these indicators take a back seat to the filters that are operative in that very moment.

A healer can act like the Optometrist who sits his charge down in front of a machine with rotating filters called lenses. She works with the person, using different dimensions of lenses until the right combination comes into place and clarity of vision occurs. The trick is not so much interposing your own filter on the individual, but finding the filters that work within the context of the persons own history.

Ultimately, though, we cannot account for, nor understand, every filter through which an individual experiences her life; responding honestly to the filters that are present, she will make a choice that appears to us as self-destructive.

Each of us makes choices like this all the time. In fact, if you look at it with a smile, we are a people who spend a significant part of our lives saying under our breath, Wow, that Gal is killing herself.

The bottom line is each of us makes innumerable choices that can and often do contribute to our deaths. Death is a part of the structure of what we know as life. This could be the most common filter of all. It makes you wonder; for all filters can be modified!

Another filter, for most of us, is that there is a Higher Power in some way involved with every moment. This ever-shifting form of intelligence, interpreted by the individual (and institutions for the individual) is called, for want of a better word (and out of my own laziness!) God. Because death happens, at a certain point we must accept that God is cool with any choice we make, even unto death.

When a bunch of a persons individual filters complement and support each other -- no matter how seemingly twisted to the observer -- theres comes a point at which a choice may evolve that becomes fixed. Even the God of any of our choices simply allows that to be. This is where the only approach left is to identify that choice, honor it as real and valid for that person, and, perhaps most important of all, let him know and then let it go.

Healers spend a portion of their time witnessing the unbearable; responding to choices that so fly in the face of their own life interpretations that it is painful to be around. But the reality is, the more you try to impose your own filters upon the individual, the more likely you are to encounter resistance.

By working under the assumption that ultimately, the person will make choices appropriate to his history (and future!), you allow the person to direct his energy away from resistance and move it closer toward seeking balance for himself whatever that may look like and whether you understand it or not.